I Can’t Stay Mad at You – At least, I try not to.

What a heavy topic for Monday! Today, at The Daily Prompt, the subject is as follows:

I Can’t Stay Mad at You
Do you hold grudges or do you believe in forgive and forget?

Well, I don’t believe in holding grudges – I don’t see the point in weighing myself down with what other people has done to me. Instead, I try to forgive, forget and let go – which, in a way, is good and bad.

If the offence done to me is something light, give me some days, I’ll probably move past it and just laugh it off. This is good because the offence is forgiven and probably almost forgotten. However, sometimes, there are some things I just can’t get over from and when this happens, I can still probably forgive and but when I forget, I’ll probably forget the relationship as well and things will not be the same again. Honestly, this is something I actually want to change. Naive as it may seem, I value the relationship I have with everyone and I don’t want to be the kind of person who easily let’s go and doesn’t find harder to keep a friendship. But, it takes effort, love, and humility…

According to Mother Teresa, we need to learn how to fully “forgive and forget” in order to truly forgive others. She said, to be able to do so like God, we need love to forgive and humility to forget. I guess, the first part is plausible. Since we love our family and friends, we also have the ability to find it in our hearts to forgive. But, according to her, unless we forget, we have not fully forgiven. Because it is when we don’t forget that we hurt each other because we tend to bring the issue up again whenever a new thing occurs. Plus, when we don’t forget, not only are we not fully forgiving someone but, we continuously allow the issue to hunt and burden us for as long as we remember. Hence, in order for us to fully forget an offence, we need to have humility and accept the fact that people are not perfect and are always prone to make mistakes.

In addition, whenever we pray “Or Father” and say, “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those trespass against us,” we have to realise and remember that the line is not about Him forgiving us depending on how much we forgive others. Instead, He is inviting us to participate in the gift of forgiveness and to forgive like He does. Think about it. If God welcomes us back despite all our sins and failures, shouldn’t we extend the same grace to others? We have to forgive not because the offender deserves our forgiveness but because we have been forgiven incomparably more by God whom we have offended time and again. Actually, by now, we should be so touched by His divine mercy that we would forgive others not simply because the bible tells us to do so but because of all the love we have received from Him. Let His overflowing grace and endless mercy liberate us to offer the same love to others.

Yup. That means free hugs to everyone. Plus, let me leave you with some wise words from C.S. Lewis,

“Real forgiveness means looking steadily at the sin, the sin that is left over without any excuse, after all allowances have been made, and seeing it in all its horror, dirt, meanness and malice, and nevertheless being wholly reconciled to the man who has done it.”

What do you think? If you want to know what other people think about forgiving and forgetting, check out this page.

 

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